Riding Her Coattails Straight to Hell!

Everyone has heard by now that the esteemed (not pitied and mockable at all) Billy Ray Cyrus is at his wit’s (assuming he had a wit with a beginning) end concerning his family’s continuing trouble. His main concern is his downward-spiraling teen queen daughter, Miss Miley.

Miley is 18 now and has been showing the world her underdeveloped body for a few years already. That seemed fine with Mr. Achey¬†Breakey. She swung her adolescent legs around a stripper pole at an awards show at the ripe age of 16…not a problem. Strange twitter photos of a sopping wet and sometimes half-nude teen Miley didn’t seem to ruffle dad’s feathers. Finally, video of Miley smoking Salvia (come on…it was pot) from a bong surfaced and she held her 18th birthday party at a bar and Daddy Two-Names has had enough!

Billy boy has been spouting his disdain for the Disney machine all over the media world in the past week. He blames Disney for his divorce, his crappy son, Miley’s blatant teenagerism and that other kid nobody knows about. It’s Disney’s fault that Miley was exposed to fame and riches and it’s Disney’s fault that she had “handlers” who didn’t properly babysit her while Dad was raking in those residuals from all of the “Oh yeah…he had a song one time!” iTunes downloads.

Well I say NO! Mr. Cyrus. If you want to throw blame on something for your inability to control your family then you better put it where it rightfully belongs. Your glorious mullet of old. Without that mullet you would have never made it to the “big time” which then would not have led to various open doors to that evil Disney Machine you are so quick to slander. Next time you don’t trust Miley’s “handlers”, try stepping in for them once in a while and spot your own daughter while she learns some new stripper pole tricks. My guess is that you’ll learn something about her. (Hint: Daddy Issues)

So there you have it. Disney is innocent. Mullets are evil. Case closed.

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One thought on “Riding Her Coattails Straight to Hell!

  1. BIGL says:

    Ok, while I whole-heartedly agree with the fact that the Disney folks are not to blame for the spiral of the Achy Breaky Hearts, I do have to add that at least BIlly Ray has enough parenting prowess to recognize the mess Miley is in. Many parents in showbiz simply let their Lindsey Lohans enter the cyclone & remain oblivious!
    As for the magnificent mega mullet…well without those be-bopping tennies that went with it, it may not have taken him so far, so maybe we should be blaming Nike!

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