Brake Light People

I know Steve Perry just cleared up the confusion on what he meant by “street light people”, but I think what he really meant to say was “brake light people” so that I’d have a segue into this new post.

One of my major pet peeves (among many, as I’m sure you’ve noticed) is when people brake on the highway. We’re all driving down a straight path toward destinations that conveniently veer off gradually. Nobody needs to stop. There are no left turn lanes or traffic lights. Just keep driving. It seems like a pretty easy idea to grasp. Just keep driving! Unfortunately, drivers in Michigan (my current area of expertise) seem to think a snowflake symbolizes the same law as a red light or octagon. Either I missed the memo for the yearly memory erasure, or every driver in Michigan winters has just arrived in this snowy climate. I understand that we must check our speeds during the snowy weather. I also understand the laws of inertia (as long as there are no follow-up questions). If you are afraid you won’t stop, just start earlier. If you get nervous on the highway, don’t drive on it. My perpetually late self will be eternally grateful.

Oh, and if you forget the rules of the road and need a reminder while pumping your brakes and hesitating every time you pass a merging on-ramp, you can always take a gander at the handy roadside signs M-Dot has provided.

“Avoid using your cell phone while driving.” Hey, this isn’t New York!

“When snow falls, so should your speed.” They’ve got that one under control.

And of course I can’t remember the other signs that annoyed me on my drive home and prompted me to write this rant. You’ll just have to take my word for it. They’re dumb.


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